MacKenzie Kozlowski (Miller)
Instagram photos and videos
Honest post: fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck (pardon my language). Adler would not sleep today unless I was wearing him or we were driving. He is being extra clingy. Throwing little fits. Crying, etc. **so unlike him** I couldn’t even manage to make myself lunch outside of throwing handfuls of pistachios in my mouth midday because he had to be held constantly. I was happy to be able to give him all the snuggles and comfort he needed, but I was really looking forward to my run tonight to blow off some steam. Mike came home for 30 minutes this evening to say goodnight to Adler and informed me he was headed back out to the farm to work until dark. It’s his busiest time of year and we take off for a week long trip to California and Seattle on Sunday. I could have said “fuck it” to the day and down a few beers, which would have likely been my solution pre-pregnancy when a day didn’t go my way. Instead I decided I’d allow myself a pass on my 5k run for the day and do an at home workout instead once Adler went to sleep. I recorded this video and then had to tend to Alder for 1.5 hours as he resisted bedtime. 🤦🏻♀️ Ten minutes ago I finally got him down and my mom offered to come over so I can go for my run. It’s 20:45 and I’m so proud of myself. Instead of resorting to old unhealthy habits I am doing something good for my mind and body instead. Motherhood doesn’t have to be about numbing yourself when challenges arise. Take time to feel the struggles and reach out for help when you need it. Did I mention Adler started leap six today? Fingers crossed this doesn’t last the whole leap because I may not make it! Hahahaha. Isn’t motherhood glamorous? // @aloyoga
What’s the first word or emoji that comes to your mind? 🖤 Mine is collaboration. I’m dreaming up a few new projects and collaborations for this upcoming next year. I’ve always loved working with other people. It pushes me. This image is one of my favorite collaborations I did with @chintwins and @nigelbarker way back in 2015. 🖤
Little man, you are my inspiration and my teacher. Watching you live and feel everything to the fullest reminds me to take time to honor my own feelings and express them unapologetically. Watching you eat and spread food all over your face reminds me to get dirty and appreciate tactical sensations more. Not to mention be consumed with the incredible textures and flavors of food. Most importantly to love. Love BIG. Thank you for loving me unconditionally everyday. You making me a mother is hands down the most profound thing that has ever happened to me. I love you Adler Hardt. xoxo
A week ago I made a commitment to myself: run or walk stairs for 5k/3 miles daily. It’s a commitment that takes approximately 30 minutes yet can hard to fit into my day. Like yesterday for example the only chance I had to do my run (without Adler) was at 21:00. Trust me when I tell you I’m not a night workout person. In fact I prefer to be asleep by 22:00, but it was the earliest Mike could be home so I did it. I can be the queen of excuses. I try to talk myself out of it - I’m human. Once it’s done I’m always so glad I did it though!! So far I’ve been consistent for a week. Let’s see how long I can keep this up! It feels good not to pant from a light jog. Postpartum my body is slowly starting to feel more and more familiar. My breastfeeding boobs are still so heavy that I wear two sports bras. I now have cellulite in the weirdest places (like my abs), but I’m so freaking proud of this body. It carried and birthed this most incredible human. My body is doing its best with what it’s been through. I love you body!! When was the last time you said that yourself? If it’s been awhile there’s no better time than the present to change that!! // @aloyoga
When at home with Adler and he’s napping I have a hard time prioritizing my yoga practice. I clean, do laundry, and try to keep our house/life relatively together. If there’s spare time during his naps I’ll do short 10 minute practices until he wakes. Here is part of what I did today. Carrying Adler around takes a crazy toll on my forearms and wrists, so mobility and strength work always feels great. I’m slowly getting my scapular protraction strength back and the ever elusively abdominal strength post c-section. I’m going to post the non-sped up version of this video on my IGTV. It’s still quite fast in order to fit everything in a minute for this post. Do these exercises/drills as feels appropriate for your body. Would you guys be interested in seeing ten minute IGTV videos of my practices? If so, what would you like to see? Per usual wearing my favourite @aloyoga.
Most meals I eat loads of veggies, but yesterday I had leftover shrimp, white wine gone bad, parmesan and lemon... it would have be rude not to make this tasty pasta dish and eat it all. I basically licked the bowl clean. Life is about balance! Adler has slowly been napping better and better which meant yesterday during his nap I was able to whip this up while he slept and completed some of my meditation training. It felt like such a luxury! I figured I should show some of the food I eat besides my husband’s incredible vegetables since I’m human and indulge too. In my defence though there is some of his thyme in this dish though! 😜Cheers to balance!!
On my story I asked who loves to always be a student! Pick me!! Pick me!! For me it’s crucial. It helps keep my teaching juices flowing. I love learning from all types of teachers. I think everyone has something to teach you if you’re willing to listen. Who do you love learning from? Tag the accounts of teachers (all movement, yoga, kettlebells, dance, Pilates, or some crazy shit I’ve never heard of before) who inspire you. I’m craving some new teachers and inspiration. If you’d like to practice with me head over to the link in my bio to try out @alo.moves for two weeks FOR FREE and learn from me and tons of other incredibly gifted teachers.
Becoming a mom has been the wildest journey. Adler was born 9 months ago on Saturday. He was born in a foreign country 8 weeks early. Shocking to say the least. Within the past week I realized since Adler’s birth I’ve associated “challenge” with motherhood, but I’ve also realized I’m the one who has created that expectation which helps to form my reality and the struggle that comes with it. Instead this week I’ve decided to sit with my power. Trust my intuition. I know Adler better than anyone else. We spend so much time together and it’s the most incredible blossoming relationship. When I hold him and he leans in to squeeze me back I know he feels safe and at home. It’s pretty surreal that soon enough he’ll be a year old because in many ways although he no longer is an occupant of my body we are still so physically connected through breastfeeding. I long for the days of a bit more “independence” and at the same time am dreading when our special bonding time of nursing will come to an end. When it does though I have no doubt we will have a new bond different in nature but still so comforting for both of us. I say it daily but I’m damn proud to be this little fighters mom. He doesn’t have any teeth yet, but everything goes into his mouth. He LOVES eating anything and everything if you’ll give it to him he will eat it. A few days ago he taught himself how to sit up unassisted. To say that I was shocked when I looked at the monitor and he was no longer laying down but sitting upright in his crib is an understatement. He has the sweetest smile and laugh. Snuggles are his favourite. His facial expressions are priceless. I’m soaking it all up as much as possible as his infant days are coming to an end. I love you little bud.
I’ve been trying all weekend to “make a post,” but the thing is anything creative or worth it can’t be forced. Instead I’m sharing this photo of a beautiful flower my sister in-law grew with my precious niece she also grew in the background. I’m starting to really believe I married into a family of people who are really really ridiculously good at growing and building stuff. This photo reminds me how incredible nature is and how fortunate we all are to be alive soaking it in. That we get to take another breath. Embrace another day. See there is it. Sometimes you just have to start with honesty and the rest will flow. I hope you all had a great weekend.
My focus for this upcoming week is to: • Step into my power • Trust my intuition • Laugh & smile a shit ton •
What about you? ❤️